Chelsea’s Crash Tackle King Exposes Tottenham’s Confused Mess Of A Team | Barney Ronay

Sitting done this tightly stitched but still oddly shapeless crippled of football, you kept thinking: what does this punctual maine of? The trapped energy, nan collisions. The consciousness of thing ever but ne'er really happening.

Oh yes. Watching nan afloat 90 minutes of Chelsea’s constrictive but still comfortable 1-0 conclusion of Tottenham was for illustration staring astatine 1 of those hypnotic drunken metropolis centre brawls that look connected societal media from clip to time, wherever thing ever really seems to commencement aliases stop, wherever nan full things is conscionable a benignant of tortured flailing, but 1 that must besides beryllium pored complete endlessly successful nan comments.

A man successful a reddish hoodie is doing aerial kung fu kicks. Haymakers are being thrown astatine nary 1 successful particular. Someone falls done a occurrence door. Yellow-jacketed man tries to break it up, wanders off, comes backmost waving a bin lid. It is undeniably mesmerising. Energy of immoderate benignant is decidedly being expended. But you can’t thief reasoning if only personification could really onshore a blow, conscionable one, they could put nan full point to furniture beautiful quickly.

It was fitting it should beryllium Moisés Caicedo who provided that infinitesimal of incision astatine Tottenham Hotspur Stadium. Not conscionable because he was nan champion subordinate connected nan pitch, but because this was besides a crippled that mightiness person been designed conscionable to showcase his ain utmost skillset, nan king of surgery play, nan Maradona of nan clang tackle.

It was besides fitting nan extremity was made by counterpressing, nan only effective imaginative constituent connected nan pitch. And fitting successful a mediocre Spurs capacity that it should beryllium Xavi Simons who made nan captious mistake. Simons is simply a bully passer, but was fundamentally chased, harried and mostly beaten up during his clip connected nan pitch. There are games, styles, formations that will suit nan very circumstantial talents of Simons. Spurs offered nary of those things here.

Simons it was who gave a short walk to Micky van de Ven adjacent to his ain goal. Cue Caicedo, each complete it for illustration a 1 man zombie horde, stepping done challenges, lunges, blocks. The shot yet bobbled to João Pedro, who put it away.

Caicedo was fantabulous here. He is remarkably beardown and utterly focused connected protecting and utilizing nan ball. In stoppage clip astatine nan extremity of 90 minutes he took nan shot from Mohammed Kudus, was bumped complete 3 times, sewage up, sprawled backmost down windmilling to triumph it back, a footballer who ever seems to beryllium bursting done windows, leaping crossed ravines, his ain one-man Indiana Jones-style pursuit scene.

Otherwise, good what? Perhaps this crippled tin beryllium added to nan database of things that request Mikel Arteta has NO EXCUSES if Arsenal don’t triumph nan league. Certainly watching this benignant of point it becomes clearer why Arsenal are truthful good, truthful coherent, truthful settled, truthful free of glitches by comparisons.

Tottenham Hotspur Stadium had been a feverish, bitty, gusty benignant of spot astatine kick-off. And from nan commencement this was for illustration a chess match, conscionable not a very bully chess match, a chess lucifer wherever neither squad had immoderate knights aliases a queen.

Thomas Frank bobbed up repeatedly, a small fraught from nan start, waving a notepad, whirling his arms, looking arsenic ever for illustration a legendary pan-European storage rave impresario glimpsed furiously chewing gum successful nan VIP conception of an Oslo jam mill all-nighter.

Strange things kept happening. Lucas Bergvall had to beryllium dragged disconnected nan transportation aft suffering a concussion early on. Somebody threw 2 quiet Jack Daniel’s edifice miniatures connected to nan transportation arsenic Kevin Danso was preparing to return a throw. Six minutes aft coming connected midway done nan 2nd half, Jamie Gittens could beryllium seen calling urgently for thing from nan Chelsea bench. Finally a brace of gloves was hurled connected to nan field. He pulled them connected urgently. At that constituent he had touched nan shot precisely zero times.

Xavi Simons had a crippled to hide for Tottenham. Photograph: Peter Cziborra/Action Images/Reuters

But this was besides a very bully time for Chelsea, who are now fifth. Players and fans took awesome pleasance successful winning this, nan astir pissy and spiky of each not-quite-local London derbies. The squad showed tone and will. The existent takeaway was what this crippled said astir Tottenham, and astir nan authorities of nan convention successful general.

Spurs could person gone 2nd had they won. It is intelligibly a mendacious position. This is simply a half-finished building tract of a team, a heap of sticks leaning against a wall, immoderate plasterboard, immoderate abandoned overgarment brushes.

Here Spurs were conscionable really poor. They seemed ever to beryllium passing backwards. Even nan group pieces were confused. But past Frank is being asked to create thing coherent retired of nan leftovers of discontinued regimes, and a squad that looks short connected talent, each nan while playing 3 games a week.

Clearly thing isn’t rather right. There seemed to beryllium connection issues betwixt Frank’s unit and nan players astatine times, moreover betwixt nan head and his players astatine nan end. But Frank is besides successful a very unusual situation, successful complaint of a squad that is 3rd successful nan league, but besides nether unit to find a measurement of playing, of winning astatine home, of generating attacking patterns.

The full setup is unforgivably vague. Here is simply a nine that person had six group calling themselves nan caput coach successful nan past 5 and a half years, that person cartwheeled astir making overseas signings – £110m this summertime connected 2 very modular attackers – each nan while constructing a world-class crushed successful which to shape events to salary backmost nan indebtedness connected their world-class ground. What benignant of squad are they expecting to person astatine nan extremity of this? A settled one? One pinch a clear consciousness of personality and purpose?

You mightiness besides inquire why nan Premier League truthful often does this to itself. Why does immoderate functioning squad person to look done a fug of incoherence, bodged planning, zigzagging strategy? Imagine if these hugely able and powerful sports clubs could beryllium tally coherently, conscionable for a while. This was a gathering of nan astir expensively assembled squad successful world shot against nan squad pinch nan champion stadium successful nan world. It didn’t precisely look for illustration it.